Going through a divorce or separation can feel overwhelming. Alongside the emotional toll, there are practical challenges too—especially when you’re trying to financially separate from your spouse and rebuild your life independently. It’s a time where guidance, reassurance and perspective can make a real difference.

This article, written by Perth-based family mediator Ian Shann, highlights a selection of self-help books that people find helpful when navigating separation and divorce. Here are 11 self help books you must read when going through a divorce.

Self Help Books You Must Read When Going Through A Divorce

Books can be a powerful support during divorce. They give you space to reflect, process your emotions and learn practical strategies at your own pace. Whether you’re dealing with heartbreak, working out how to financially separate from your spouse, or simply trying to move forward, the right book can help you feel less alone and more in control.

It’s Called A Break-Up Because It’s Broken by Greg Behrendt

Written by Greg Behrendt and Amiira Ruotola-Behrendt, this book takes a direct, no-nonsense approach to breakups. It encourages you to accept the reality of the situation rather than dwelling on “what ifs.” With humour and honesty, it helps you shift your mindset and begin letting go—something that’s especially important when you’re trying to move forward and financially separate from your spouse.

Unf*ck Your Breakup by Dr. Faith G. Harper

Dr Faith G. Harper blends science, psychology and straight-talking advice in this practical guide to healing after a breakup. The book explores the emotional and physiological effects of heartbreak, helping you understand why you feel the way you do. It also offers actionable steps to regain control, which can be very useful when life feels uncertain during separation.

From Heartbreak To Healing by Cora Ashwood

This book focuses on guiding readers through the emotional recovery process after a breakup. It offers reflective exercises, affirmations and gentle advice to help you rebuild your sense of self. For anyone struggling with the emotional side of trying to financially separate from your spouse, it provides a calming and supportive approach to healing.

Break-Up Boss by Zoe Foster-Blake

Written by Australian author Zoe Foster-Blake, this book takes a witty and relatable approach to breakups. It combines humour with practical advice, covering everything from handling social media to rebuilding confidence. It’s a lighter read but offers valuable insights into moving forward with strength and self-respect.

No Breakup Can Break You by Nick Dawson

Nick Dawson’s book focuses on resilience and emotional strength. It explores how breakups can be an opportunity for growth rather than just loss. Through personal insights and guidance, it encourages readers to rebuild their identity and move forward with confidence, even during challenging times like divorce or separation.

Getting Past Your Breakup by Susan Elliott

Susan Elliott’s well-known guide provides a structured, step-by-step approach to healing after a relationship ends. It includes practical tools like journalling exercises and boundary-setting strategies. The book is particularly helpful if you’re looking for a clear plan to move on while managing the practical realities of separation.

Letting Go of Your Ex by Cortney S. Warren

Psychologist Dr Cortney S. Warren focuses on the emotional attachment that often lingers after a breakup. This book helps you understand why it can be so hard to let go and offers strategies to break unhealthy patterns. It’s especially useful if you’re finding it difficult to emotionally move on, even as you work to financially separate from your spouse.

Break Up Ascension by Saskia Claudia Kalwinek

This book takes a more spiritual and reflective approach to breakups. It encourages readers to see separation as part of a personal growth journey. Through mindset shifts and self-reflection, it aims to help you find meaning and strength in the experience, rather than feeling defined by it.

How to Heal from Heartbreak (or at Least Feel Less Broken) by Carissa Potter & Vera Kachouh

This journal-style book combines simple text with visual elements to explore the emotional stages of heartbreak. It’s accessible and easy to read, making it a good option if you’re feeling overwhelmed. The book focuses on self-compassion and taking small steps forward, which can be helpful during the early stages of separation.

Split: A Memoir Of Divorce by Suzanne Finnamore

This memoir offers a deeply personal account of the author’s own divorce. Suzanne Finnamore shares her experience with honesty and humour, capturing both the pain and the unexpected moments of clarity. It’s not a how-to guide, but it can be comforting to read a real-life story that reflects the complexity of separation.

Conscious Uncoupling: The 5 Steps to Living Happily Even After by Katherine Woodward Thomas

Katherine Woodward Thomas introduces the concept of “conscious uncoupling,” focusing on ending relationships in a respectful and constructive way. The book outlines a five-step process to help you navigate separation with greater awareness and intention. It’s particularly relevant if you’re trying to minimise conflict while you financially separate from your spouse and move forward in a healthier way.

Divorce and separation can feel isolating, but the right resources can make a real difference. Whether you’re working through emotional healing or figuring out how to financially separate from your spouse, these books offer guidance, perspective and reassurance.

As Ian Shann highlights having the right support through his family mediation work with separating families in Perth – through professional guidance and/or trusted resources.  He can help you navigate this chapter with greater clarity and confidence.